The Light Faded From My World

(Written by sword9, translated by AI)

I once thought I was not an irredeemable person, that luck would shine upon me one day.

Let me figure out where to begin this story. It all started back in 2018, when I played CS. That was when I got to know Viva and Oisaber. Jem is still active within VCT‑CN to this day. Back then I was not a pro player. I admired them deeply, dreaming of stepping onto the same stage and competing alongside them. Later I set off chasing that dream. My first CS pro career did not go well, yet I was only 22, still full of hope.

Then the pandemic forced me to take a break from competing. Once restrictions lifted, Luoking and JXR invited me to join TSG.Valorant. That was my first encounter with this game. Since there was no official CN server at the time, stable tournaments were few and far between. Luoking and I bounced between multiple organisations amid constant roster reshuffles.

It was at Lizhi where I first met Nobody and ZmjjKK, two prodigies not yet 20. Kangkang had not even turned 18 back then. We had no coach. After practice each day, we would review demos and do aim drills on our own. One sweltering summer noon, Kangkang turned up late for scrims. I chewed him out harshly. I told him he would never amount to anything if he could not get his discipline straight. Looking back now, it is almost funny. That scolded youngster had grown into an elite carry.
Lizhi consistently ranked top‑3 in CN domestic competition, and offers started rolling in for me to play overseas. Deep down I was still a risk‑averse kid. I turned those offers down. I could not bring myself to abandon those promising teenagers for my own gain. They were the future.

Months passed, and the domestic server still had not launched. Lizhi disbanded. Kangkang and Sen went to EDG, the biggest club in China. Luoking and I, unable to keep Q9 running, moved to a new team, Kone. Financial constraints troubled Kone, so we trained remotely. Still, my teammates were all self‑driven competitors. Our results stayed solid. Back then I was full of optimism, seldom feeling drained by practice. I kept waiting for the CN server launch. Yet consecutive final losses to EDG chipped away at my confidence. Still, two runner‑up finishes earned us our first shot at international competition. We lost that event, but I knew there was more ahead.

A month later, Kone fell apart after Masters Shanghai. The CN server was about to go live. That dark day felt like the end of the road for me. Offers poured in from China’s top organisations. I settled on EDG. It felt like the safest ticket to the world stage. The team locked me in a medical room, recruiting me, promising me 3% of championship prize money. That was the first time I had heard of championship prize shares, a moment I will never forget.

EDG had just lost the domestic title to ASE. I messaged muggle: I’m here, we will win from now on. We fist‑bumped in the afternoon; he placed his trust in me. Before flying to Tokyo, my EDG teammates and I claimed a domestic trophy. Right before departure, management told me my visa application was submitted too late. I could not make it to Tokyo. They promised they would bring me to Los Angeles. I told them I would do my best. The boys went on to win the CN spot. Back at the bootcamp, I broke down match VODs and drew strats for them. I devised the dual‑Initiator Gekko‑based setup for Bind, a strategy copied by teams across the globe. I felt on top of the world, convinced this was the start of my lucky break.

My EDG teammates put CN on the map in Tokyo. After they came home, fans would crowd outside the bootcamp for photos. That was the funny anecdote where I was mistaken for security staff. Hardly anyone knew who I was.

We won our first offline trophy, the CQ Championship, upon their return. I thought my world‑stage debut was finally within reach. Everyone got visa invitations for LA, but only eight core members were issued. My name was excluded. They tried scrambling to secure paperwork for me, yet I never made it to Champions LA. Even so, I still believed opportunities awaited. VCT‑CN was only just beginning.

Towards the end of that year, I left EDG to chase my own dream. Few organisations wanted a 27‑year‑old veteran. AG reached out. I am grateful to Master and Sega for giving me a second chance. I transitioned to coaching at AG. It was Sega’s first head‑coaching role. We made quarter‑finals, yet my contract expired and was not renewed. Opportunities still seemed to lie ahead. Viva and stew invited me to JDG. Fortune was not on my side. Meanwhile EDG lifted Champions. The promised 3% prize share shrank to 1.5%. They said it was a miscommunication. muggle and the organisation topped it up with 15,000 RMB as compensation. I remain thankful for that gesture. Hope still lingered.

Soon afterwards, I accepted an offer from tyloo through tyleo and management. My coaching tenure began. That tyloo roster had not made playoffs for an entire year. I was told success would not come

holy AI slop

(Continuing from the above)

overnight. We won only one match in Stage 1. The story got off to a rough start. Sun Kelun requested a transfer. I sat in his room talking with him all night, then lobbied two executives, Zige and 117 (Team Principal), to keep him. Days later, SiuFatBB tried convincing me to step down. zjc was transferring to EDG. After much hesitation, I agreed to take over as head coach. My player buy‑out became my coaching signing bonus, which 117 approved. He kept his word. I scouted for external firepower. I had my eye on Splash. I stressed to agents and management how talented he was, but he needed to learn Chinese; communication is critical for top‑tier competition. He was underage at the time. Again we exited in quarter‑finals. Many behind‑the‑scene factors led to that outcome. It was one of my lowest moments, yet I hoped young talent could thrive here.

Moses turned eighteen, and we moved into new housing. As the team’s most fluent English speaker, I roomed with Moses. Billy and hypnotizing’s English was limited. Every review and strat session had to be translated for Moses to ensure he understood. It was exhausting, yet I kept my word to agents and his family, hoping Moses would one day become great. Later, erv joined, giving us three young players: erv, Moses, and Scales.
Sometimes after scrims, I would re‑run VOD analysis with Moses in English, and give extra feedback to Scales and erv. At the Guangzhou kick‑off event, I felt like my old self again. But Moses choked four crucial rounds, and that stung deeply. He kept saying “Let me play” in comms. I told him in our hotel room: you are incredibly skilled, but you cannot win alone. You need your team. I hoped he would absorb that lesson.

Conflict flared during the Beijing event. erv drew criticism for reckless late‑round plays. Sun Kelun and I publicly reprimanded him. I wanted to run Neon comps on Haven and Pearl, but our roster philosophies clashed. Frequent arguments erupted. In hindsight, I may have been in the wrong. Again we fell in quarter‑finals. I told 117 I was burnt out and wanted to step back. He responded sincerely. He suggested I try streaming while still coaching. Zige told me I needed to set clear priorities. Tensions flared within the roster. Once tyloo blew a huge lead in Stage 1, I argued that we should avoid force‑buy on eco rounds. Sun Kelun countered that gun skill should carry us. We lost again. I enforced strict no‑force‑buy rules on eco rounds, sparking another fight. With no one else to fill the IGL spot, Billy and hypnotizing did not want to sign Xiao Mai. I proposed three solutions to management late at night. They chose to acquire Xiao Mai. He came to my room, I walked him through our game philosophy, and he agreed. 117 and I spoke with him the next day, and he officially joined.

Before Stage 2, a heated dispute broke out between Billy and me. I believed Haven required Jett‑Waylay comps, while Billy thought FUT’s aggressive playstyle justified running risky retakes. I called FUT’s retake logic dumb in frustration.

Another blow‑up came when I wanted erv to sit so Sun Kelun could duel. We smoked two cigarettes in the kitchen before reaching a compromise, still bickering.

SiuFatBB reached out soon after, saying management wanted to arrange streaming for me. I thought they were terminating my contract. I snapped at SiuFatBB. Both owners messaged, asking me to cool down. I was not fired; I was placed on team leave with paid vacation. I accepted.

After the Changsha event, I realised streaming was not for me. Over crawfish dinner with 117 in Shanghai, I expressed my wish to return to coaching. He advised me to rest, watch from the sidelines. I pressed: what if we qualify for Champions? He promised I could coach on‑site at Champions. I held onto that hope.

I arrived early for Chengdu. I wanted to be there if the boys qualified. Yet I kept thinking: I am quarantined, I should stay away. I wondered whether the team even needed me. They locked in their Champions spot. I showed up uninvited for the trophy photo. I borrowed a championship ring for the photoshoot. The staff said the ring was only for players. 117 told me I deserved it more than anyone, and my name would be on‑site for Champions. I was overjoyed.

In the end, Zige wanted to talk with me at a teahouse in Chengdu. He said bringing me to Champions would be unfair to Billy and the rest. He said tyloo could win without me. I was furious. He told me I did not fit the team culture; I should not have shown up unannounced. I was cut from the Champions roster. I felt cast aside, wronged. There was nothing I could do. I sought prize money compensation of roughly 200‑300 k RMB. 117 suggested I take time off. Next day SiuFatBB summoned me to a basement room. He asked what made me think I deserved Champions prize money. Effective July 1, I was no longer entitled to championship bonuses. He said housing benefits were performance‑based. The organisation had already paid me 150 k buy‑

sad situation i thought siufatbb was a nice guy

.

almost cried

Breaking: Now sword9 is lost contact.
Source from LiZhi.

Before he posted this article, he said “I'm gone, thank you for being part of my life.“

Meanwhile, his friends called police a few minutes ago.

Updated: sword9 has been found, all thing are well.

So he got kicked last week and decided he was really done with life?

super big drama

what an unfortunate ending, I hope the guy is okay

legit done dirty in so many ways

Holy drama(like daily in CN esports orgs)

updated: LiZhi said the call didn't go through...

very unfortunate situation, praying for sword9 as for TYL management this is very disappointing..

what the fuck.. i pray for that man and I hope he's okay :(

update: sword9 has been found, now he is in the police station.

ayo wtf did i wake up to ? is this org scummy ? i always thought sword9 was a good coach. no one deserved to be treated like that

Wow. I mean I don’t want to assume anything but this seems pretty fucked up to me. The guy was really giving it his all and they couldn’t even honour the work he had done by letting him have some sort of presence at champions IN SHANGHAI? Also if im understanding correctly the person who handed him the termination papers was the manager and not siufat right because why tf would a player be having that conversation with him

Without sword9 there wouldn't be a TYL Splash #justsaying

wow
fuck tyloo

sword9 deleted this article 1 hour ago.

apparently when tyloo won sword9 wasn't even invited
he showed up on his own with a jersey bought online

sword9 posted 2 minutes ago:

Regarding my inappropriate outburst last night, I want to offer my sincere apology to all my fans who care about me. I am truly sorry.

Secondly, I requested personal leave for Stage 2. The club continued to pay my salary in full and supported me to lift the trophy alongside the team, granting me a proper send‑off. However, overwhelmed by my emotions, I shared a number of biased accounts on social media. My words have inflicted severe harm on my teammates, with whom I fought side‑by‑side for two years, and on the organisation that has supported me and placed great trust in me. I feel deep remorse and apologise once again. I urge everyone to refrain from speculation and attacks against our roster. I will continue to stand behind this team that we built together.

Lastly, please allow me to formally apologise once more to TYLOO and all followers of VCT‑CN for my over‑reactions. I am sorry.

.

god protect him; this shit is bizarre

too long... pls summarise it in less than 100 words

Bruhhh wtf