hey guys. its like 3 am right now. my neighbors have been fucking their brains out the whole night and i havent gotten any sleep. couldnt even use the washroom because i forgot to pay my water bill lol. anyways idk ive just been in a deep state of thought of how i can like, spiritually become closer to valorant like on some chakra shit. i feel like this valorant thing it's my true calling in some way. i wake up eat shit sleep think about valorant all the time and i just cant find myself to stop loving it. im trying to find a way to love it even more, but there's this mental wall in front of me, like its not a real wall its like in my head or something idk whatever but you get what i mean and im trying to break this wall and stuff.
anyways this thought has been in my head for a very long time now. my therapist i kinda blackmailed into getting free sessions with (lol) says it has somethign to do with my lack of a parental figure in my life or idk and that i gotta get over it and find my real parents and not these fake adopted ones i gre wup with that i dont like but idk? like what that has to do with anything related to valorant? or how i can get closer to it? idk its just weird. anyways for the past hour ive just been staring at photos of valorant and the agents on google images and i just love the art and the themes and the stuff related to the game. its not really unique or anything but it just works, like phoenix and gekko and chamber i think those are some cool guys.
so ive been staring at these images and ya
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