Made a short story

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#1
LifeDiff
0
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Changed stuff

Hank had bought the pistol two weeks ago without much conversation, He had brought up the matter a few times the Wednesday of, but when he got back with the weapon the next day not a word was spoken. We lived in a nice neighborhood, but he didn’t take any risks when it came to our health and safety, especially Janice. Life360, Cameras, water filters for store bought gallons, only organic mostly kosher, and a health insurance plan that made him live paycheck to paycheck on six figures. He loved us, especially his little girl, he loved her more than me. No one showed up for her 15th birthday, why would they? She was a socially inept, 15 year old autistic girl, whose only way of communicating was breaking people down, something she had honed after being on the receiving end of the breaking for seven years. Hank called in sick to work that day and spent the entire day talking with her, then the same the next day. A week later Janice had made her first friend, Clara. Clara was a nice girl, nice enough to hang out with a girl she had nothing in common with, that is until Janice punched Clara in the gut, after experiencing her first of many meltdowns. Hank, being the loving father he is, found out who Clara was, and paid her to remain friends with Janice. However, his little girl could hardly look Clara in the eye after what she had done to her and they stopped talking a month later. Janice never really talked to any boys, she was attractive, but not attractive enough to believe it. There was one boy although, a few days after her junior year of high school started, she met a boy named Leo, he was into all the things she was into and they became friends, best friends. Janice loved Leo, although she didn’t understand what that meant yet, and because she didn’t know what the word meant she could never speak it, so when she saw Leo talk to his girlfriend, a cruel silence was all that could exit her throat. Janice stopped talking to Leo, after that, and Leo feeling equally betrayed stopped talking to Janice. And unfortunately for Hank there was nothing he could do to save his poor little girl. The only thing that ever made Janice feel human was soccer, something that took over most of her life. She had little interest in sports when she was a child, but on her 13th birthday Hank dragged her and her cousin to see a match he had gotten free tickets for. After that day something changed in Janice, she had always been an obsessive person, but this time it was on a different level. Before school she would listen to transfer news, during classes she would watch matches, during lunch she was on the field, never playing only practicing, When she got home she would practice some more, her dinner would be accompanied by a full tactical breakdown of the latest La liga match. She improved a lot, but not enough to make the freshmen team with the girls who had been playing soccer since they were 3. She didn’t eat for three days after that, no matter how much Hank pleaded with her. But eventually Janice was back on her feet, she changed her structure, upped her intensity, and was able to make the JVB team the next year. Janice was happy for a while but disappointment crept in as her inability to move into the A team became apparent, her regiment no matter how many times she changed it stopped granting her development. And for the first and last time Janice talked to me. She talked about how small she felt, how little she was improving no matter how hard she worked, about not having the talent or the time to overtake her peers, she wished she was handed a ball when she was three, she wished she was a boy, because no matter how much talent she had she would never truly reach the top of the ladder. She told me there was no one else in the world she hated more than herself. I told her that it was ok she wasn't talented, it was okay she wasn't a boy, and it was okay that she hadn't been promoted to the A team. I spieled on about her talent in math and how much money she could make in accounting. Janice had never been a rebellious child, the only reason she wouldn't do what she was told was because she was too lazy to follow through or too stupid to understand. But when I told her that she looked at me like she wanted to start a war against the universe. She didn't respond, just stared down at me like I was the child. Her mental state only declined from there even after she finally got promoted to JVA. I tried to intervene, Hank bought her new equipment and a personal trainer. Janice knew her father loved her more than anything in the world, but she never took advantage of that, instead she grew to fear it, because she knew she was a failure and failures can’t be loved for long. Her theory was put to the test on her 22nd birthday, two weeks after her stint on the Florida State University soccer team had come to an end without a word from NWSL teams. She had of course trialed for many teams, and had been rejected by all. I thought she would change, realise that she was chasing a dream she could never really achieve. The only reason she ever made it as far as she did was by breaking her body, there wasn't a single bone in her body with the talent to play the sport, and her brain was never meant for it. Her attempted overdose came as a shock to me however, but I assumed it was a ploy for any attention and love the parasite could find. I wish she did it, I wish that was the one thing she could finally succeed at. Hank had to intervene, spending nearly 10k for her two week stay at a psych ward. The second attempt was met with the same response, and the third made me truly believe she wasn't doing it for attention. It took a toll on Hank, her sweet little girl didn't want to live anymore, that was all she wanted, her delusions had finally fallen through and she had nothing. The fourth was on her 27th birthday, Hank had spent the entire day with her. They talked and talked and talked, and Frank even said she seemed happy. The drugs were locked away, The knives were kept in our room and anything she could use to choke herself had long been hidden. Hank loved us afterall, that's why he bought a pistol two weeks ago, he didn’t lock it up, he didn’t hide it, he didn’t buy a case for it. He placed it on a table in the living room, adjacent to Janice’s bedroom. He loved his little girl, more than anything in the world.

#2
sp0rtsman
1
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aint reading allat

#3
Code28
0
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chatgpt wont even shorten it ...

#4
LifeDiff
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bro trust its peak

#5
saltyedamame25
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Holy shit man this is great, you should consider writing a book

#10
LifeDiff
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thx, alr am

#6
Pototo
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need season 2 ASAP

#7
GetWired
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Tldr

#8
Kattring
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Nah bro what tf is this

#12
LifeDiff
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trust bro its peak

#13
Kattring
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I have read it bro. Both the writing and timeline are all over the place

#9
Yuxin
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1

#11
Zelestia
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Here I fixed it for you.

Hank had bought the pistol two weeks ago without much conversation, He had brought up the matter a few times the Wednesday of, but when he got back with the weapon the next day not a word was spoken.
We lived in a nice neighborhood, but he didn’t take any risks when it came to our health and safety, especially Janice. Life360, Cameras, water filters for store bought gallons, only organic mostly kosher, and a health insurance plan that made him live paycheck to paycheck on six figures. He loved us, especially his little girl, he loved her more than me. No one showed up for her 15th birthday, why would they? She was a socially inept, 15 year old autistic girl, whose only way of communicating was breaking people down, something she had honed after being on the receiving end of the breaking for seven years. Hank called in sick to work that day and spent the entire day talking with her, then the same the next day.

A week later Janice had made her first friend, Clara. Clara was a nice girl, nice enough to hang out with a girl she had nothing in common with, that is until Janice punched Clara in the gut, after experiencing her first of many meltdowns. Hank, being the loving father he is, found out who Clara was, and paid her to remain friends with Janice.
However, his little girl could hardly look Clara in the eye after what she had done to her and they stopped talking a month later. Janice never really talked to any boys, she was attractive, but not attractive enough to believe it. There was one boy although, a few days after her junior year of high school started, she met a boy named Leo, he was into all the things she was into and they became friends, best friends. Janice loved Leo, although she didn’t understand what that meant yet, and because she didn’t know what the word meant she could never speak it, so when she saw Leo talk to his girlfriend, a cruel silence was all that could exit her throat. Janice stopped talking to Leo, after that, and Leo feeling equally betrayed stopped talking to Janice. And unfortunately for Hank there was nothing he could do to save his poor little girl.

The only thing that ever made Janice feel human was soccer, something that took over most of her life. She had little interest in sports when she was a child, but on her 13th birthday Hank dragged her and her cousin to see a match he had gotten free tickets for. After that day something changed in Janice, she had always been an obsessive person, but this time it was on a different level. Before school she would listen to transfer news, during classes she would watch matches, during lunch she was on the field, never playing only practicing, When she got home she would practice some more, her dinner would be accompanied by a full tactical breakdown of the latest La liga match.

She improved a lot, but not enough to make the freshmen team with the girls who had been playing soccer since they were 3. She didn’t eat for three days after that, no matter how much Hank pleaded with her. But eventually Janice was back on her feet, she changed her structure, upped her intensity, and was able to make the JVB team the next year. Janice was happy for a while but disappointment crept in as her inability to move into the A team became apparent, her regiment no matter how many times she changed it stopped granting her development. And for the first and last time Janice talked to me. She talked about how small she felt, how little she was improving no matter how hard she worked, about not having the talent or the time to overtake her peers, she wished she was handed a ball when she was three, she wished she was a boy, because no matter how much talent she had she would never truly reach the top of the ladder. She told me there was no one else in the world she hated more than herself.

I told her that it was ok she wasn't talented, it was okay she wasn't a boy, and it was okay that she hadn't been promoted to the A team. I spieled on about her talent in math and how much money she could make in accounting. Janice had never been a rebellious child, the only reason she wouldn't do what she was told was because she was too lazy to follow through or too stupid to understand. But when I told her that she looked at me like she wanted to start a war against the universe. She didn't respond, just stared down at me like I was the child. Her mental state only declined from there even after she finally got promoted to JVA. I tried to intervene, Hank bought her new equipment and a personal trainer. Janice knew her father loved her more than anything in the world, but she never took advantage of that, instead she grew to fear it, because she knew she was a failure and failures can’t be loved for long. Her theory was put to the test on her 21st birthday when she had her first suicide attempt via overose. Of course it failed, just like everything else she’s done in her life, but Hank had to intervene, spending nearly 10k for her two week stay at a psych ward. The second attempt was met with the same response, and the third made me truly believe she wasn't doing it for attention. The fourth was on her 27th birthday, Hank had spent the entire day with her.
They talked and talked and talked, and Frank even said she seemed happy. The drugs were locked away, The knives were kept in our room and anything she could use to choke herself had long been hidden. Hank loved us afterall, that's why he bought a pistol two weeks ago, he didn’t lock it up, he didn’t hide it, he didn’t buy a case for it. He placed it on a table in the living room, adjacent to Janice’s bedroom. He loved his little girl, more than anything in the world.

Fixed this for you.

#14
LifeDiff
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thx bro

#15
troy
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JANICE STFU

#16
LifeDiff
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?

#17
troy
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Drake reference

#18
LifeDiff
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oh

#19
s0pp_fanboy2
-1
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Pretty nice

Though i wonder what 'spieled' means

Also pretty fucking stupid to become suicidal cause you cant make a football team 😂😂

#20
Nats_2nd_biggest_fan
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spiel is like a long prepared speech

#22
s0pp_fanboy2
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Thanks

#23
LifeDiff
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  1. Soccer wasnt the only reason
  2. Soccer was the only thing that brang value to her life, and since she couldn't pursue it to a level that would satisfy her it gave her greater depression
#27
saltyedamame25
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Did you read the story? The girl is a failure in all aspects of her life, was treated like shit by everyone and lost all of her best friends

#21
Nats_2nd_biggest_fan
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is this a cyclical narrative

#24
LifeDiff
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kinda

#25
zak9
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Janice? like janice stfu?

#26
LifeDiff
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nah i just thought of a random name

#28
brams6662
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how did she survive 3 suicide attempts damn

#29
LifeDiff
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Ikr, she cant succeed at shit

#30
LifeDiff
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bump

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