How many of y'all are depressed
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genuinely im probably at the lowest point of my life emotionally because i just got led on by a girl for over a month of dating and 4+ months of us liking each other just to get friendzoned because she isn't a relationship person and would prefer us to be friends
also no vct ig
well these days i heard a beautiful quote from ethan hawke saying the lover always wins cause to feel anything is to live a joyful life even if your heart breaks. it happens but it will pass there are plenty of fish in the sea and life is preparing you for the one
that's a pretty cool quote & way to look at the situation
thanks foythvlr
I would say the k word to berlinglazer but I'd get banned
I know it's hard, and despite you not being able to control that outcome, I believe that it's hard to assimilate being led on like that. It happens to the best of people, because we can't predict what people want - human minds are way too complex for us to do so, the only ones that could maybe predict so are those specialized in like psychoanalysis. It's fine to sink, hell, I was in your situation not so long ago. But you can't let it take over your mind, because that's when you spiral and the worst happens. Try restructuring your thoughts, by not blaming yourself over it. Likewise, don't embrace things that bring you sadness, that was my worst mistake: listening to the bleakest music I'd find because it'd comfort my fragile mental state. Cut off all contact with her - it brings you nothing, if she friendzoned you is because she wants to keep you as an option, and you leaving will trigger two scenarios:
-
She'll panic because she does like your attention, but not the idea of you as a partner, and will try everything to take you back, which is by flirting, not taking accountability, and mixed signals. It's imperative you don't respond, always think of how much pain it brought you. A verse I always remember from an album I have listened to in my worst moments (Watching from A Distance by Warning) says:
"Though you'd never change,
Please remember when you ever think of me"
Always keep this in mind, she won't change, and with your absence, give her a reminder of what she did to you. She'll crawl back, trust me. Everyone does. -
Your life will improve. Not from one day to another, because grief is a long process. It usually takes months for me. But, the darker the night, the brighter the sunrise. Grind, follow your passions, improve, so you feel proud of yourself. I'd recommend keeping a diary in which you mention 3 things you were grateful of today.
I know it's hard, but you can do it.
i know her pretty well from where we've been friends for a decently long time & given the fact that she hasn't dated in over like 5 years, i don't think she's trying to keep me around as an option. I told her that I'm distancing myself pretty heavily for a bit so i can improve my own wellbeing, but I do hope to actually be her friend again since we do have a good bit in common. Most of the issues stemmed from the fact that she genuinely wasn't ready for a relationship & didn't see me romantically even after giving it a chance. I don't have any hard feelings towards her, it's just that I need to refocus my efforts into my studies & improving at my instruments. I'm not going to fault her for "leading me on" considering how honest and open she was about the breakup, i do genuinely believe that she cares for me, just not romantically & her ending the relationship when she did gives me time to heal before some upcoming events that im looking forward to spending time with her as a friend to where it hopefully won't be awkward.
the entire situation is pretty nuanced im ngl, it's hard to describe on a place like vlr without like a full college thesis level essay & the backstory of how we met & how we get along
That could also be a scenario, but I'd still choose to distance myself. It's hard to detach emotionally from someone, especially since there are no hard feelings, so it's your call
not me. im doing pretty happy. senior year in high school, still putting up good grades, got accepted into universities i wanted, having fun playing new val gamemodes with friends, life is good!
as for anyone else who may not feel the same way: speak out! theres many people here who fuck around a lot but are genuinely really helpful. i love you all!!
i spoke out and bg said i deserved it so i would actually advise against that
minority vs majority. majority of the people are always willing to help.
take the jayde post for example, only like 2 people (whyz glazer and someone else joked around about jayde), while majority of the people cared and still wrote heart touching messages. i wouldnt pay attention to those tiny little people
always gonna be those few people that dont take anything seriously, there’s always going to be people in life trying to take you down, so many fakes, so many weird people, respect yourself keep your self worth
Remember that hate messages aren't a reflection of who you are and you matter!!
meeeee
living through my personal horrors for the last 6 years and when i told my parents 5 years ago they forgot :)
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