Copypastas

My humor is broken. I laugh at copypastas. Give me your funniest ones (doesnt have to be val related)

I met him today in Paris and after a bit of smalltalk I asked him what team he’s gonna join.
He answered it’s a French team with a big fanbase, that’s relatively new in valorant.

He added: „please don’t leak this!“, but he trusted the wrong person

Hang on guys, I need to sneeze😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😳🤧 ‘scuse me.

Brazil Haters Modus operandi

Step 1: Call Brazil Bronzil, brazilians monkey, be toxic and mock every Brazilian team
Step 2: Predict all Brazilians go 0-2
Step 3: Watch the match

Step 4:

If Brazil loses:
Step 4.1.1: mocks brazilians and be toxic
Step 4.1.2: play victim when brazilians call out your toxicity
Step 4.1.3: Wait for the next match/tournament starts
Step 4.1.4: Go back to Step 1

If Brazil wins:
Step 4.2.1: act like you never were toxic against brazilians
Step 4.2.2: play moralist and create a lot of topics calling brazilians toxic
Step 4.2.3: Wait for the next match/tournament starts
Step 4.2.4: Go back to Step 1

My humor is broken. I laugh at copypastas. Give me your funniest ones (doesnt have to be val related)

the best one:

STATS

mwzera https://tracker.gg/valorant/profile/riot/VK%20mwzera%234324/overview?playlist=competitive&season=all
cNed https://tracker.gg/valorant/profile/riot/ACE%20cNed%23carry/overview?season=all
TenZ https://tracker.gg/valorant/profile/riot/SEN%20TenZ%230505/overview?playlist=competitive&season=all

DEATHMATCH STATS
mwzera - 86% win rate (thats the insaniest thing ive seen in a while)
cNed - stats not availiable
TenZ - 73% win rate

RANKED STATS
mwzera - 66.3% winrate (MVP of 95% of the matches) proof here https://imgur.com/StiJmpg
cNed - 53.5% winrate (MVP of 13% of the matches)
TenZ - 60.4% winrate (MVP of 15% of the matches)

can you take your time to appreciate how insane mwzera is? without a doubt the most talented player to ever touch the game

I'll try to explain briefly why I think he is the best player in the world
Despite his insane aim and movement
The best way to know if a player is a good duelist is RAZE. There is a BIG difference between a good duelist and a jett abuser
If he is a good duelist, he needs to be good with raze.

heat? not good with raze
aspas? not good with raze
xand? not good with raze
tenz? not good with raze
cned? not good with raze
scream? not good with raze
d3ffo? not good with raze
derke? not good with raze

Thats why I think he is undoubtely the best player in the world. If RIOT by any means decides to nerf jett and shift the meta we prolly not gonna even hear names like cned and tenz again :>
He is not killing 40+ per map because when he joined VK he was forced to play a different role because heat is already a main jett... and lets be honest, every single duelist nowadays gets 20+ kills per map because team and setups are basically built around you (even steel managed to get 20 kills with it https://www.vlr.gg/29398/sentinels-vs-100-thieves-champions-tour-north-america-stage-3-challengers-playoffs-gf/?game=46692&tab=overview)

My humor is broken. I laugh at copypastas. Give me your funniest ones (doesnt have to be val related)

STATS

TWITCH FOLLOWERS
aspas - https://www.twitch.tv/aspaszin (276k followers)
Derke - https://www.twitch.tv/derke (51k followers)
TenZ - https://www.twitch.tv/tenz (2.8 MILLION followers)

TWITTER FOLLOWERS
aspas - https://twitter.com/loud_aspas (136.7k followers)
Derke - https://twitter.com/derkeps (78k followers)
TenZ - https://twitter.com/TenZOfficial (1M followers)

can you take a moment to appreciate how clouted TenZ is? he has so many damn fans because he's just SOOOOO good at the game!

I'll try to explain briefly why I think he is the best player in the world
Despite his insane aim and movement
The best way to know if a player is a good duelist is if they're the best on ONE main agent! This will prove that TenZ plays jett since he's simply the best jett in the world!

heat? nt (not tenz)
aspas? nt (not tenz)
xand? nt (not tenz)
yay? nt (not tenz)
cned? nt (not tenz)
scream? nt (not tenz)
d3ffo? nt (not tenz)
derke? nt (not tenz)

Thats why I think he is undoubtely the best player in the world. If RIOT by any means decides to nerf jett and shift the meta, TenZ will unleash his chamber on the rest of the world.
He is not killing 40+ per map because Ratzam tells TenZ that he can't change his mouse or sens during the game which really messes up flow... and lets be honest, every single duelist nowadays gets 20+ kills per map because team and setups are basically built around you, but SEN all try to make individual plays which prevents TenZ from DOMINATING.